Student Nature

I'm a bad person! I've been a neglectful blogger... :(

Isn't it always the way though...when something becomes something you 'have' to do, even if it's something you really enjoy, you just don't want to do it anymore?

I think I'm going to miss you the most, Gary the Vampire Slayer...

Hence. I have a dissertation to finish and two essays due for Friday, so here I am blogging. :P Oh dear. I would blame it on student nature, but I don't think that's a real thing, so let's just call it what it is: a momentariness lapse into sheer laziness. 

This is what I do when I've been involved in something epic: I put my everything into it, then have a huge crash afterwards. It was true after I designed and headed art department for a short film last year, it was true after I was Head Scenic Artist for the RSAMD's panto, and it's true of this. 

Outpost was huge for me, for so many reasons. Obviously the work was hard; but that's just the nature and reality of Scenic Art, and one of the things I love about it. It's good, old-fashioned, sore muscles and collapsing into a real true sleep kind of day. It's hands-on, it's dirty, it's losing all vanity and accepting that you will be stained, hurt, cold, and probably stinky at the end of the day. For me, it's life. And my life would be empty without it. 

But all that aside, when I went to Outpost I had the added stress of knowing that I was actually being assessed by my Head Scenic Artist. I know she had many other things on her mind at the time, but I was also aware that at some point she will be forced to sit down and actually reflect on my time there, write down her thoughts, and send them onto my lecturer. 

No pressure...but I had to be amazing! 

Time management, attitude, work ethic, competency, workshop awareness...I had a mental list in my head, trying to keep myself constantly in check, and worrying far too much. Too much to actually just enjoy myself sometimes, maybe, but that's a lesson in itself, don't you think?

So after I was done there, I had a bit of crash mentally. Didn't really feel up to anything hard, so I returned to uni with bright ideas for working on pieces for our graduation showcase in between whatever production work was happening in the department. It was a bit like coming home when I arrived at the paint shop. I even caught myself inhaling (with pleasure) the weird familiar smells of the still new building. 

You know it's bad when you get excited because you recognise stains on the floor...

I allowed myself some time to recover. 

I set myself up with a bit of a 'warm-up' painting and spent a blissful three days staring at a beautiful bird. 

It's a self portrait. Recognise the nose?

I haven't really painted anything since summer last year, which is a nonsense. True, in scenic art you won't often get to do much 'fine art' painting, but it's silly to not keep your skills sharp anyway. So cue Wee Beaky here to get me back in the swing, before tackling a nice new painting to display at the Grad show (maybe) It's looking promising, should be finished before the weekend so will keep you updated ;)

This week I've been a bit hyperactive. I'm full of beans, and words, and ideas and energy. I wonder if it's because it's creeping towards the end of term. Usually the summer term is my best one for progress and results and all that so I'm excited to see what's going to happen! I'm graduating soon, and I'm feeling a bit like the world's my oyster. 

In the immortal words of Charlie Sheen: I've got tiger blood. Winning, anyone? Sounds like winning!

Perhaps should wrap this up. Get some essays written. Get some folk emailed. Get some Oreos scoffed.

Wishing you all a pleasant night! 

Love, love, love, love! 

Xx

"I look back at where I'm from, look at the woman I've become, and the strangest things seem...suddenly routine." - Hedwig and the Angry Inch